For once, we'll have a chapter that has no disturbing (and overly hormonal) Sims.
That's for the next chapter.
*cough*

At any rate, our dear VP seemed to become a bit bored stuck at home.
Alone.
So, he did what any other bored, lonely Sim would do! He spent all day surfing the web for porn. He called up a taxi and went to the park!
Oh and Dick had a grand day at the park.

Let's take a look, shall we?

The first thing Mr. Cheney did after exiting the taxi was to whip a large watering can out of his pants (Don't look at me, I don't know how he did it either!) and water all of the flowers out front.
What a great guy!


Any lonliness was short lived, as almost immediately upon arriving at the park, a buxom blonde teenaged Sim decided that Mr. Cheney looked interesting.
She initiated a conversation with him, and I'm fairly convinced he was just pretending to listen as she kept bending over and bouncing around. He made far too many suggestive looking hand jestures and talk bubbles for there to be any other intent.


"Look, I'll try one more euphamism..."


The young woman either was not interested, or was too young and naive to understand what it was that Dick was after.
He bid her good day, and took a walk over to the swing set to relieve his frustration. Not like that, you sick perverts!
By swinging, carefree, and almost childlike with complete strangers.

"Oh...my...JESUS!! I LOVE SWINGING!"


"SWING SET! SWING SET! UP AND DOWN I GO! WOOSH GOES THE WILLY WIND, BLOWING THROUGH MY TOES!"





"Um, excuse me Mr. Vice President but when did you start chanelling President Bush?"


Unable to take the strain of that horrific insult, the VP decides he's had enough of the swing set.


Looking around the park, the VP noticed that most people were engaged in un-American activites such as being civil to those who looked Middle Eastern, playing chess, and having philosophical or political discussions.
Ever quick on his feet, Dick whipped out a 6 pack of hot dogs from his pants (probably from the same pocket that he keeps the watering can...) and held an impromptu cooking session.
Perhaps he thought he was campaigning?



Grilling complete in a mere five seconds, and with magically appearing hot dog buns, Mr. Cheney set places at all of the picnic tables and called the park denziens over for a free meal.
...and a good time was had by all.


Especially by Mr. Cheney, who made a new friend out of that blond guy.
Is it just me or does it look like Cheney's cramming hot dogs up his nose in the first shot?




...right, there's smuttiness in the next one, I promise.